THANKSGIVING HAS COME! The Fast is Done.

Amen to Thanksgiving!  And especially Thanksgiving turkey.  After my long fast, I was so ready for the Southern feast of traditional treats that were on my menu yeasterday.  And, if I say so myself, they were really good.  No complaints from the inmates, anyway.  Thanksgiving dinner had been a motivator for me through my fast.  But, what I was thankful for this year was something very different than I thought it would be. 

My fast started out with a list to the Lord of what I now know are "gimme's".  Lord, gimme a buyer for my house.  Lord, heal my child.  Lord, help me with my problem with sugar.  Lord, help me get moved quicker to PA.  Lord, give my special friend the job she is praying for.  Lord, gimme, gimme, gimme!!!!

The first week, it was still about that.  But, fasting has a way of evening the playing field in time.  It strips you of any facades in place and exposes the real you.  To yourself, to God and to others, at times.  Like an onion being peeled off one layer at a time, self begins to shed it's winter coat and the trimmed down version of your soul is staring you in the face and obvious to others.

This morning. I read  a blog by Lysa Terkeurst (http://www.lysaterkeurst.com/)  that spoke of an experience in her walk with Christ that parallels mine with my fast.  She describes being on a road trip on the back roads of the Deep South with it's aging barns, remnants of harvested crops laying in the fields, gas stations with dust on the gum that was waiting for a buyer and old, stale coffee instead of Starbucks lattes 

And. then. there are those handpainted signs of evangelism that you can't miss.  She writes about seeing one in particular that said "Repent. The day of Jesus' coming is near. Repent of your sins today."  It made her uneasy and she thought it wouldn't be very effective in causing people to want to turn to Jesus because it seemed harsh.  She felt it should be about God's love.  Now, the love message gets to the heart of people, But, repentance?  That's too harsh.  But then, she realized that after two days, it was she who was still thinking about that sign.  She writes this, "I’ve been on this 37 days of kindness adventure for over a week now. And instead of feeling all puffed up by all my many acts of kindness, I am brought low by the realization of just how self focused I can be sometimes."

I believe she has found on her 37 Days of Kindness adventure, what I have found on my 40 Day Fast.

That, beyond our "good intentions" and "maturity in Christ", there's an awful lot of "Karen" where I thought there was more Jesus.  I wanted to see that Jesus was the dominant factor in my life.  Driving all my thoughts, feelings and actions.  But, I learned, I'm still piloting my own life in so many ways.  I let Him be my First Officer, but I have retained my Captain status with Him.  My fast showed me I had chosen the plane, the flight plan and the destination on many things.  My reasons for beging my fast in the first place was evidence of that.

Don't get me wrong.  He wants us to come to Him with our needs and the needs of others.  Seeing Him meet those needs builds our faith and the faith of others.  It may even bring someone to Christ watching you go through a trial and then seeing God move in an amazing way.  But, what about faith that doesn't produce "amzing" things?  At least not amazing things in the natural or that anyone else can perceive.  How do we feel about that?  Is His grace sufficient then? 

Someone said to me this week that she had lost trust in God because she felt she had been faithful to him over many years and yet He was not answering her basic needs.  He  did not make the changes in her spouse that would have saved their marriage.  God doesn't say that if we live by the law.......pay our tithes, attend church, obey the 10 Commandments, help others and read out Bibles, that life is going to be great.  But, He does give us His Word that if we lose everything in His name, that He will keep us in perfect peace as we look to Him. He says in John 16:33 (Amplified Bible) "I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world. [I have deprived it of power to harm you and have conquered it for you.]". 

If we truly have given our life to Christ and are trusting Him with eveyrthing, following Him as He directs, and tough things still come, we must know that He has allowed them.  They are not to hurt us, but to make us stronger and to learn to be more like Him.  Our response to suffering is our choice, not His.

Jesus  obeyed His Father.  He had some precious times in His life here with his family and followers, but He also suffered with mistreatment, betrayal of the very ones He trusted, plots for His death and the ultimate disgrace of this world, by being crucified on a cross next to two common criminals.  Even in His death, He had a heart of mercy and forgiveness as shown to the thief he gave the promise of Paradise to that day.  How could He concern himself with someone else in His greatest hour of need?  I will tell you why........

Jesus KNEW what came after the cross.  He knew WHY He was suffering.  He was not short sighted.  He was thinking of you and me.  And, He knew His mission.  The mission didn't end on the cross.  It ended with an empty tomb.  He paid that price.......his emotional and physical pain........because he knew the empty grave would give us back to Him.  The devil had plotted to take us from Him and won.  But, just for a little while.  The empty tomb was the ticket for us back to Him
My fast was a "Repent.  The Day of Jesus is coming" kind of fast.  Week two, was the beginning of it.  To the end, it was rough.  I was lonely.  Depressed some days seeing the truth of seeing what my heart really held inside.  Truths that many of my hurts were still bured deep within me.  I'd been healed to a point, and because I have the ability to help others find healing through knowing Christ, I must have felt that my own level of healing was enough. 

I felt stripped and exposed before Almighty God, but thankful that I could get that close to Him.  Close enough for Him to say, "Karen, here's something.  Look at this.  I want to take you further, but we need to clean this up first.  Look at it.  Allow me to sweep it away,"  I did.  It wasn't fun, but it was cleansing.  I'm clean now inside and so now I am filling myself back up with Him instead of Karen.

I had to admit that I like  to have a certain persona.  One that wants her nails to look just right, her skin to be flawless and her hair beautiful.  Who loves  to put on a good suit and pumps and look elegant, lovely and professional.  But, a persona or image is not who we really are.  It's what we think we should be to "fit" the pat of the Christian woman we feel we should be.  When I  fall short of that image, I sometimes  feels I have failed God, myself  and  ny family. 

God showed me I am sometimes the little girl that is still so impatient that she can't sleep all Christmas Eve night in anticipation of the next morning, so much so that she is nauseous and nervous the whole time.  I am the girl that dated the guy she wasn't crazy about because the one she loved had hurt her and she wasn't willing to wait for the one she really wanted.  Nor did I think I was worthy of getting what I really wanted. The image didn't like my  house with Cheerios on the floor or cups and plates strewn everywhere from the teen age entertainment fest the night before and thinks what a failure she is as a homemaker and woman because if she was worthy of anything, she'd have a perfect house.   Beth Moore probably doesn't wake up with a kitchen hurricane! And when I  could not  rid herself of the craving for sugar night and day, I thought God must be disappointed in me as I fail another time with Coke in hand and my goal weight off somewhere in the distance.

I grew up thinking God was looking down on ,e to look down on me. The "disapproving, never good enough, sorry I am left with you" Father God making sure I didn't get what I prayed  for because I just don't deserve it.  If I was thinner or prettier or more successful, THEN God would be smiling at me and saying "Ahhhh, that's my girl!"  And when I did succeeed......winning a rock radio station's "Little Miss Radio Who" beauty contest, or making MVP on the softball team, always being national honor society or making a tennis team.......I always thought it was just a fluke and even then, I was still not as good as others.

My view of what God thought  of me has been warped by what feel others felt about me.  I learned He's not against me or ready to punish.  He's waiting to bless me, hold me, praise me, and save me. He's not judging me, waiting for me to slip up.  He's there to hold me ad looking forward to it.

I thought that Karen was gone from me.  I thought I had sent her packing many years ago. When this fast showed me she was still in the guest room, I was surprised.  I wrote a book several years back called A Treasured Woman, and in it, told of my journey from worthlessness to being treasured by the Lord.  God wanted me to see that I had let myself fall back into some of that stinkin' thinkin' and it was time to get rid of all of it.

It wasn't a pretty sight as it has exited.  Ask my husband, Ross.  He will tell you.  I'm sharing this so transparent;y here because  I know many of you have felt them too.  I hear it from so many women.  I am all of you.  One thing that was evidenced in this fast is I know where to go for my answers........to Christ and His Word.  Coaching, counseling, therapy, a friends's shoulder (which comes with the added bonus of a good hug hopefully).........all places that God's Word and instruction can find the support needed to help you fulfill His will for you life.  None of us are islands unto ourselves.  We need each other. 

My fast has helped me see myself, know the One who will change me, and see my value in the midst of my own struggles and flaws.  I do believe there is power over the devil through fasting as well.  That will be the topic of the next blog.

Love to each of you,

Karen

Four More Days of Fasting.......Oppps! I coulda had a Master Cleanse Fast!

That's right.  A Master Cleanse fast.  How appropriate would that have been for my 40 days?  I just now leaarned about the Master Cleanse fast and am on my first day of it as I close down this particular fast.  It's a real detoxifyer.


This fast would have gone alot smoother for me had I known about this, but I prayed to the Lord as I was struggling with this fast.  I believe He allowed me to know about this to help me down the road and to end my fast on a great note.


Here's the Master Fast - No food.  A lemonade type drink using Grade B Organix Maple Syrup (you can substitute organic Agave Nectar if you like - I think it tastes better and is lower glycemic which is great for diabetics.......also less expensive too,) lemons, and cayenne pepper. 

Here's the recipe:
2 Quarts Filtered Water
1 Cup Grade B Organic Maple Syrup or Agave Nectar
1 Cup of Fresh Lemon Juice (usually 5 large lemons) 
-  Put the water in a pitcher for the fridge.
-  Squeeze the lemon juice and pour in water.
- Measure 1 cup of sweetner and mix in.
- Pinch of organic cayenne pepper (if you don't have organic, its fine)
- Stir really well and keep cold. 
This is your days allotment.  Make sure you drink it all each day, making a new batch each day.

Pretty simple, but very effective.  The lemon is a real boost for cleansing your liver.  The cayenne pepper helps with your metabolism.  The Grade B maple syrup gives you the nutrition you need.  We aren't talking Aunt Jemina syrup here, Ladies.  Don't use that.  Google Master Cleanse and you will see so many great sites.  I am using a pre-prepared formula, but I imagine the freshly made is much better!


This is the only thing you eat or drink during your fasting time.  You are to also use a herbal tea laxative or the sea salt water flush.  I'm going to start with the salt water flush and see if I can tolerate it today.  If not, then I will go the tea route.  You need to remove the toxin waste from your body that the cleanser will bring and so this part of the plan is vital.

Sea Salt Flush Recipe:
- 2 teaspoons Organic non-iodized Sea Salt
-  Large Glass of water, Can be warm.... (up to 16 oz, less is better if you can stand it)
- Mix and drink at one sitting
-  Expect "results" in about 30 min. to an hour.  Make sure you have another hour at home or
   somewhere a restroom is available for the next hour. (Truly important. You will see why. :-)


People report not only weight loss, but softer skin, clearer thinking, power over cravings and an over all boost to health.   This is a wonderful way to kick  start a healthier nutrition plan. 


I have a problem with sugar cravings.  I've gotten off all sugar at one point, but I could never seem to stay off of it.  One little indulgence of temptation would always put me back in sugar chains.  The other night as I prayed, no more specifically, cried out to God for help with this sugar addiction in my life, He led me to this detox plan.  I'm pretty well detoxed right now except for I still have incredible cravings for sugar and not only visions of sugar plums are "dancing in my head", but chocolate mousse cake, creme brulee, Krispy Kreme bread pudding (Paula Dean recipe, THE BEST!), rice krispy treats, cherry cobbler, ice cream......oh my goodness......that is what has been calling my name like a siren on a far way shore to a lonely sailor.  But, I do think this will help me today.


I'll let you know how it goes. 


Thanks for being with me on this journey.  It's been glorious and it's been horrible.  It has produced result in regards to my prayers and it has changed my heart.  God dug out alot of hurt and pain deep in my heart I thought was already healed. It wasn't, but I am better now and working on it.


Most importantly, I can now help others through this journey.  I will support anyone that prays and feels God is calling them to a prolonged fast.  Just write me at porschemom3@aol.com and let me know.  I am praying for you all as we get ready for Thanksgiving week.  Are your menus planned?


Love to you all in Christ,
Karen


What awaits me in heaven! :-)
It is paradise, isn't it? Then
cupcakes will be there, Girls!

FASTING: Day 31 - Appearances

Left, is a photo of the Mormon temple in Orlando, Florida.  I remember the first time I saw it.  It was evening. and all along the roof top edges, light was shining up high into the sky, illuminating the steeple.  I didn't know at the time it was a temple and thought it was a Jewish synagogue instead.  Until seven years ago, I really thought the Mormons were born again Christians.  I now know that isn't true, but at the time, the beauty of this building touched my heart and I came back later in the week as the sun set to take photos of it. If you have any questions about Mormonism, I'd like to refer you to my friend Shelly Grimm's web site at http://www.lifeafter.org/ .  I love the Mormon people, as they are some of the finest people I have ever met.  But, they do not believe in the same Jesus we do, though they will say they do.

This temple reminds me of Isaiah 58, where the Pharisees are complaining to God because they have fasted and He is not answering their prayers.  He tells them that He is not pleased by their fast.  Though they look very religious, pure and holy, in fact they are not.  For as they are fasting for God to hear their cries, they are living in sin by treating others with disdain, deceit, unloving and doing wrong.  God says "Is this the fast I have called you to?"  He says that sarcastically.  Yes, I do think He spoke this way in His Word.  Maybe He really said "Give me a break, you evil guys!  Don't play games with me.  I know you are trying to look holy, but your hearts harbor greed, evil and hate.  You don't care about anything but looking good in front of others. Now, listen to what a REAL fast is about and what it will do.  Then you will know WHY I don't hear you!" 

I've had some negative responses to my fasting blog.  One person emailed to say that if I really wanted to please God, I would have done my fast in secret and not made a big deal of it.  She wasn't unkind about it and I think she really felt that way. I know there are verses that say when you fast, don't complain and look sad because you can't eat so others will feel sorry for you or think how holy you are.  I understand that.  I wanted to answer her here just in case others felt the same way.

I didn't want to talk about my fast to be honest.  I wasn't sure I was going to do one this long in the beginning.  I just knew that God had been tugging at my heart for a month to think about doing a much longer fast.  I kept praying and He kept talking to my heart about it.  As I stated in the beginning, it would have been alot easier for me to fast without telling anyone. In my opinion, anyway.  But, as I took that to God, I know He moved me to seek prayer support for my fast and that He wanted my fast to encourage others to do so as well.  Trust me, though I have been doing shorter fasts for over 30 years, I did not look forward to this 40 Day fast.......more specifically, I didn't look forward to failing at it. 

I believe I followed God when I started blogging my journey here.  I didn't do so in an attempt to say "Hey look how Godly Karen is......she's fasting 40 days....wow!"  No, I wanted to encourage others to join me, pray for me and cover my family in the blood of Christ as I did this because I knew the enemy would attack as God brought answers and deliverance.  And he has.  My daughter was in a hit and run accident in the second week.  She was fine and I believe the fasting is what spared her.  My son is making progress in his own journey of struggles and I see God doing a mighty work in Him though he has encountered new harrassments from the enemy.  One special young friend went through crisis and I am seeing God meet her need.  I believe there was power in praying for her because fasting breaks yokes the enemy puts on believers.  Another best female friend feels certain her career position is turning around and has had good news. This was something I was fasting for.  So many specific things have taken place that I have prayed for, while at the same time, some terrible blows and crisis have occured too.

Besides seeing very evident answers to things, God has done so much in me.  That is what I see was His real purpose.  I have failed in some ways in this fast, as a couple of times I had to eat something small but solid.  I felt so bad the other night I was concerned, so I made a few eggs.  It made me very sick.  I felt defeated over that until I prayed.  The Lord reminded me this fast is not about MY strength, MY success, or MY ability.  It's about depending on HIM.  I'm learning I can get back up and stand before Him, knowing He is not judging me. 

I've faced the old demon of rejection in my life.  I'm not through that one yet, but I'm making progress.  I've missed my husband during this month so much and have watched the enemy try to use that to divide us, but God has come in and brought peace and patience.  He's once more taught me that my worth is not in what I look like, the abilities I have, the possessions I own, or even in my faith.....be it large or small.........though those things may make me more effective, successful, or productive, they have nothing to do with my value.  My value to God is just in BEING ME.......yours is in being YOU.  And truthfully, what He looks for is obedient hearts.  Not talented ones.  Intelligent ones.  Beautiful ones.  Just obedient ones.  This is what He is looking for from all of us.

I know I am rambling.  I'm sorry.  He has given me some powerful messages during this fast. I'm in the process of writing them now. Tonight, I just wanted to remind myself and you, that whether we fast or don't fast......succeed or fail.....look great or look not so great......He couldn't love us more than He does now.  Yes, we may do things for Him and build His Kingdom, but we can't DO anything more for Him to love us more.  He just does................And because He loves us, we can love each other.  The world hated Him.  They will hate us too.  Don't be afraid.  He is with us and He has left us The Comforter.......the power of the Holy Spirit.....we are more than equipped.

Loving in Him,
Karen

THE BEAUTIFUL SOUNDS OF CELTIC WOMEN.....ENJOY!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sfO6JpR5Ip8&feature=PlayList&p=8195CF0F9E4B638E&index=0&playnext=1

Music to worship out Lord to.......

Praying this afternoon and thanking God for His power, love, might and deliverance.

Sending You Love,
Karen

My daughter, Tori, loves the Celtic Women.
If anyone knows their 2010 Tour Schedule,
I'd sure like to have it!  God knew what He was
doing when He created our sister Eve, Ladies!

FASTING: Day 29 - We all need a loving nudge sometimes......

http://www.eaglesneedapush.com/

Have you ever seen the amazing videos, books and inspirational tools at Simple Truths (http://www.simpletruths.com/)?  I go there often to see what they have newly available.

The above link is one of my favorites.  A mother eagle helping her young eagle child leave the nest high above the treetops so that he might learn to soar with confidence.  She loves him enough to nudge him out of the nest.  She knows he will love soaring on the currents of the wind.  He was born to do so.  The wind will fill his wings and she knows the surge of power and joy her young eagle will experience once he gets over the fear of the first leap from the nest.

Aren't we just like that with God?  We love our comfortable nest in His care and just want to stay there nice and cozy under the "shadow of His wing".  But, He knows we have glorious skies yet to soar and that if we stay under His wing, we will not know that joy.  There will be rain, storms and  powerful winds to deal with.  But, He has equipped us with wings that will repel that rain. We have a nest that we can come back to when the storm gets too dangerous to fly in.  And, those powerful winds, will be what propels us to soar even higher.  They won't break us.  We are designed to make good use of them as we use self control in the middle of it all.

This fast is a "nudge out of the nest" for me.  I wasn't comfortable with it because I didn't want to fail.  Not fail God, my family, my friends, or myself.  I've enjoyed the soaring.  The rains have come, but I am dried off now.  The winds have been high and seem to be going higher, but that just means I can see from greater heights.  And my nest......well, although in the natural, it is looking pretty empty, Jesus has kept it for me to come back to......a place of safety, love and rest.  It's not a place to hide, not from Him and not myself.  But, to take shelter instead.

I have 11 more days of this 40 Day Fast.  I'm a bit worn out, to be honest.  But, I know there is more to learn.  Right up to the last day.  Some days I feel alone.  Other days, I feel totally encircled in love.  But, one thing I have found, there is never a day that I don't feel the Lord around me in a deeper way.  His Presence is here when I feel up and when I feel down.  Many breakthroughs have already taken place as a result of Him honoring my fast and I am so grateful for that.  Many problems arose during my fast that I could have never anticipated, but required spiritual strength and application.  I was ready because of my fast. 

Fasting empowers you to minister to others and bring deliverance in the Name of Christ.  It puts you under God's X-Ray so you can see what is underneath your surface personality, going right to you spirit and heart.  It's greatest gift is a deeper, renewed intimacy with the Lord that will urge you to make fasting a regular part of your life in Jesus because you never want to lose that sense of closeness with Him.  It's a Win-Win situation, Sweet Friends.

Today, I am wrung out, but I feel the encouragement of God slowly coming over me this morning.  There is much to do today and even though my heart feels a bit sad this morning, I feel a slight breeze in my backyard.  It seems to be building slowly today.  I have a feeling it's going to be getting stronger.  Strong enough to carry this Lady Eagle to a lovely soaring experience before the day is out. 

I've been nudged from the nest.  Will you join me?

In His Love,
Karen

Soaring Eagles Get the Best View.......

FASTING: DAY 22 - My Empty Nest

For the past few years, I found myself in discussions with other parents of young adult children on the verge of flying the coup.  As the topic turned to the dreaded empty nest years, most of my friends bemoan it's arrival and say they know it is going to be a difficult time for them. 

I didn't seem to share that opinion.  Not because I don't adore my children.  I do. They are my babies and always will be.   But, in raising my children, I didn't have  extended family support (my parents were both with the Lord)  and therefore, the "grandparent weekends" alot of my friends talked about enjoying with their husbands, I had never known.  I think it took it's toll on me over the years, so I would always say that I think I wouldn't have much of an adjustment to the empty nest at all.That's what I thought at least.  But, for the past month or so that I've been rising, working, eating (well not lately of course), and sleeping in this big house by myself, I'm finding the empty nest isn't so comforting. 

I'm what you might call an extroverted introvert.  I love people, so socializing energizes me.  I like taking time to get to know who you are and what you dream of doing with your life.  After all, I may want to help you do it!  But, after being with people for a certain length of time, I'm ready for some solace and time to pray.  I will listen to some music, drink truffle latte's or tea,  and hibernate for a little while.  Not for long, but long enough to catch my breath, fill up my tanks and be ready to go again. 

But, there's no one here now to carry me into exhausted rest and drive me to retreat.  I'm in  retreat mode 24/7.  Two kids in college, one living in an apartment way across town and working, two boys in PA with Ross.  My husband lives and works in Pittsburgh, PA, as he waits for me to sell our house here and move.  So, my long awaited  "quiet time" without kids or male type people to cook and clean for (that would be sons and a husband) has arrived.  ( I will miss my "girls only" household dress code.)  With it has come a  slow creeping loneliness that I have not experienced since I was young.   I can say after having my heart and house filled with the joys of being a wife and mother, it's not the same kind of loneliness though.  I started listening to Christmas music in September this year.  Enough said.

I now have greater empathy for my friends who's children have left home.  I used to envy the freedom and clean homes they enjoyed.  They could go to the movies or dinner any time.  I still had some sweet young life waiting at home starving for Mom to cook.  Now, I understand their hearts more.  I have seen a look in their faces that depicts the way I feel right now.  Not sadness, but loss.  Life isn't over, but life is altered.  An anticipated loss, but a loss still.  It requires a life transition that takes time.  We have to give ourselves that time as we process it mentally, spiritually and emotionally.  Mostly, emotionally I think.  It's not grief really, as we know those kids will come back to visit.  And with the present trend of older children (often with their own children) coming to live back at home, they might even be coming back for more than a visit. 

I think the loss is situational and will fade in time.  But, I do think it's important to be active in your transitioning from one season of life to another.  Just as the Word says when we remove a  dark presence from of our life (not that children are darkness in our lives, goodness NO! Well. hopefully no, anyway), we must sweep it clean, and then fill it back up with the Spirit of God.  When you have experienced any loss, it's wise to replace that vacant space in your life and heart with something healthy and rewarding. 

I realized tonight that even though I am waiting to step into a different life in Pittsburgh with Ross, I need to "fill my house" with what and WHO the Holy Spirit is leading me to because there is a void right now.  I'm just starting to see how He has done that for me. If we are the Lord's child and walking with Him, every part of our life has a purpose.  His purpose for me during this time was my call to fast and the lessons I needed to learn from it.  It's no where near over yet. 

I miss my kids.  I miss my husband.  But, I am  spending time with special friends before I leave and that is a gift that I will carry with me as I move to Pittsburgh.  Drinking in every precious moment with the Lord I have right now is changing me.  Odds are this time will never come again for me.  At least, I can't imagine being away from my Sweetheart this long for any reason in the future.  I hope not.  But, this time is not lost.  It's been rich in spiritual knowledge and intimacy.  I am thankful for that.  God chose it for me because He knows I will need these lessons to walk in His calling for my life in the future. Is He allowing you to wait on Him as He prepares you for something in the future?

I find it so interesting that God "arranged" this empty nest time for me as He called me to this 40 Day Fast.  On one hand, it doesn't require me to cook much.  That helps.  And, it gives me time and space to seek Him, pray in intercession and to be able to sit still to listen in my heart to what He is saying. Waiting.  That hasn't been my forte until the past two years.  Along with blessing me with an amazing husband, God used this special man to teach me patience.  I've never been known for it before.  I always had an underlying sense of not making things on time or not being able to wait for God to move.  Like I am holding my breath all the time.  (Don't go psychologist on me here, Girls) I am finding out that I need His strength and closeness right now as I face these lonely days and nights.  I have learned paitence and can wait on Him.  He is here.  Right on time.

Have you experienced an empty nest?  Did it leave you feeling lost or did you let God "fill your house"?  If you found God waiting in the empty rooms, share that when you see a woman with that  look  of loss on her face.  She needs you.  Hug her.  Have coffee.  Cook dinner together.  Watch a movie.  Go for a walk.  Pray together.  Replace loss with relationship and let God make it one of the best seasons of your life because you shared it with a sister.  I'm sharing it with mine right now. 

Love My Sisters in Christ,

Karen

PRAYER REQUEST:  I wrote about my friend, Nancy, a few days ago.  There is a picture of Nan and I cooking Thanksgiving dinner.  Tuesday, Nancy's elderly parents were hit in their car by a city bus in their hometown in Michigan.  Nancy's 87 year old Mom was killed and her Dad is in the hospital with neck and back injuries and now in a halo brace.  Please lift up Nancy and her family tonight and ask God to give them strength, comfort, peace and rest.  Thank you so much, Sweet Ones!

FASTING: Day 20- Turn Up The Heat in Your Spirit with Fasting!

Thank you to Jim Duffy, CEO & President of Refining Fire Chiles of San Diego, California, for the photo of the beautiful hot chiles he raises and markets.  Jim is "turning up the heat" by sharing the gospel through his business and the youth ministry he supports with it.  Go to http://www.refiningfirechiles.com/ and read his powerful story.  Blessings to you, Jim!


Country steak with gravy.  Garlic, mashed red potatoes.  Middle Eastern green beans over herbed rice.  Chocolate chip cookies.

No, this isn't fasting delirium kicking in.  It's what is sitting on my stove right now - hot, delicious and waiting to be enjoyed by my daughter, Ashton, who is on her way here after work to eat one of her favorite "Momma Meals". 

 A surprising thing happened as I cooked  for my precious girl.  After 20 days of not eating solid food (except for my one day of Daniel fasting when I had soup and celery and my Sam's Club near fainting ingestion of two strawberries and 8 pecans), I wasn't  tempted to set another plate and sit myself down to dine.  No one was more shocked than me. How can it be that a G.R.I.T.S. (Girl Raised in the South) chick like me would pass up her Momma's country steak recipe after not having real food for 20 days? I mean, not one bite, friends.  It sure smells good, and at this point of cooking, I would have at least had a bite of something just to make sure I had seasoned it right.  (You all do this when you cook, now, and you know it! ) But, somehow as I made this meal, it became an offering of love.  Not just for my daughter, but for my Jesus.

I had prayed that this fast would help me arrive at a new place of self-control in my life.  A place where nothing, not even a basic need to eat, would dominate my desire to please my Savior.  That day came today.  It was staring me in the face on my kitchen stove.  My own Mom's Signature Southern Meal.....country fried steak!  I wanted it, but I wanted to please the Lord more.  Eureka!  It was a new experience for me.  But, it isn't just an experience.  It is empowerment to allow the Holy Spirit to come and do His work in my life and the lives of those I am interceding for. 

Satan hammered away at me yesterday.  Down to my core.  Bringing up old issues.  Telling me to stop writing.  I don't have to be a gifted writer to share my testimony.  I am a sinner saved by grace with a story of redemption to tell in the best way I can.  I'm not worried about being a great writer.  Yes, I want to bring praise and excellence to anything I do for Jesus and I pray for ability as I write about my love for him.  But, I don't write to be known for my ability. He knows why I write.  I want to expose everyone to His awesome love and power.  Writing is one way I can do that.  Someone told me along time ago, that spoken words are beneficial for the moment, but the written word is forever there to minister to generations.  I like that.

I want hurting women to know that HE LOVES THEM and that their value has to be found only in Him and not what someone else thinks of you!  It doesn't matter where they are in their life.  Single Moms feeling lost and lonely with PB&J smeared faces looking up sweetly knowing Mommy will make the moon rise.  Widows looking at a desk full of bills and statements piling up that they have never had to deal with, while they grieve the loss of their Beloved.  Young women dealing with past issues of abuse wondering if they will ever be able to trust any man enough to become a wife.  Older women who feel the ache of disappointment and lost dreams.  Successful, professional women who have invested their lives in a career, who long for their arms to be filled with a warm, cooing bundle of baby love, thinking they have lost their chance for marriage, family and homemaking.

We all hurt.  But, in different ways.  Speak from where you are into the lives of others and see the healing it brings.  Nothing is more comforting than the supportive love of someone who has been through the same thing as you and has come through it successfully.  It brings hope.  Simply, just share the love you have found in Christ with others and let Him bring the harvest in their heart.  Our job is to sow the seed.  The Holy Spirit will give it root and fruit.  And someone else may harvest it.

If you have a testimony to the healing, redemptive power  in the Gospel of Jesus Christ,  do as Rev. 12:11 (yes, my life verse) says and "overcome evil by the blood of the Lamb and THE WORD OF OUR TESTIMONIES".  However you are capapble of doing so......in word, song, writing, serving, loving, leading, teaching, comforting, edifying.....whatever God leads you to do.....just do.

In being "doers" of the Word, we will turn up the heat (Big Habanero Style) on the enemy of God by bringing restoration to the object of the Savior's delight, US!  "US" being all men and women, saved and unsaved.  Fasting puts pressure on Satan.  He will do whatever he can to keep you from walking in this discipline because he knows it means defeat for him.  The heat of fasting does two things: (1) It allows buried sins to come to the surface, where God can help us see them, repent  and bring us restoration (like purified silver); and (2) It breaks strongholds, bondage, and demonic attack off of us and the lives of those we pray for.

I am asking you to consider fasting as a part of your walk with Christ on a regular basis.  Remember Ezra and Nehemiah of the Old Testament?  Both men of God who fasted for the repentence and return of their people to God.  God honored them both. He also met all their requests for provision and visions.  They are just God's people like us.  They were just born earlier.  Am I talking to an Ezra or a Nehemiah here today?  Who is willing to stand in the gap for others?

Love in Christ,
Karen

FASTING: DAY 19 - Letter to Satan

Blair Wingo of P4CM.COM.......
"Letter to Satan" by Blair Wingo

Please click on the link in red above. 

New message from a new generation of Christian soldiers.

Clear and simple.  Simple obedience.  No excuses. 

No flirting with the enemy.

She says it perfectly in a way  her generation will hear.

Every generation should hear.

Will you?   Will I?  I ask myself after listening to her poem, what do I need to be where Christ want's me to?  I ask God to strip me of whatever holds me back from being pure in obedience to Him. 

Jealousy?  Unforgiveness?  Pride?  Fear?  Impatience?   I think I can say yes to all of those being some part of my life.   I pray Lord, cleanse me of these sins that stand between You and me.

Treasuring You in Him,
Karen

FAST: DAY 18 - The "WHY'S" of my fast

This picture was taken in our Pittsburgh front yard at the height of Autumn spendor last year.   I'm so happy today becaucse  it  finally feels a bit like Autumn in Florida.  Just cool enough to peak it's face in the door and say "Hey". (That's Southern for hello) 

Fall is a reminder to me that though growth and maturity often come via pain and discomfort, they propel us forward  into rewarding changes.  And if we take time to stop and look, we will find amazing beauty from the process of change.  Beauty that was not there before.   Like the fire red and golden ambers of the leaves on our trees. 

 Now those leaves have fallen to the ground and our trees are barren.  Soon, Mr. Winter will come and those very branches, that once were adorned by the blaze of color above, will be veiled in frosty shimmer.  What appears to be loss, has once again brought about another form of beauty.

Fasting has been this for me. 

I am about to move to a new state to establish a new life.  A life that I prayed and fasted for in 2007.  God blessed my petition and obedience to His Word with the marriage to the Man of God He has called me to be in marriage covenant with, Ross.   Yes, I'm thrilled.  But, the challenges have and are still difficult.  Two homes to maintain and sell.  Five young adult children to guide through this blended family transition at the point they are entering adulthood.  College costs.  Nurturing our new mariage and getting to know each other better.  Total adjustment.  Unexpected illness. 

These were the "WHY'S" that I started with at the beginning of my fast.

They are still there, but as God leads me during this time of humbling myself in submission to Him alone, interceding for so many people, and just being in His presence, those "WHY'S" aren't what is motivating me to continue.  It's the change in me that holds me.  I'm not doing this for God and not for those reasons.

God's fast is turning the "green leaves" of my heart and soul into bright red, pumpkin orange, and golden amber.  Their beauty is bringing me joy and pleasure.  Soon, they will drop off, with branches waiting for God's first lovely snow and will be adorned for a different kind of beauty.   I am decreasing so God can increase within me.

This has now become my WHY.

Tomorrow, I want to talk about Isaiah 58.  Take a look at it and see what you think.

I'm feeling great, by the way.  No hunger.  Just drinking liquids.  Less fresh juice or anything that might start digestion really.  This is the way I will go in the future for other fastings too.  My thoughts are clear and I hear God without confusion.  It's not easy, but it's wonderful.  I am praying you will join me in a lifestyle of fasting and see what God might have for you and yours.

Treasured and Loved,
Karen

And miles to go before I sleep......and miles to go before I sleep.

My friend and sister in Christ, Priscilla, sent me an email to encourage me in my fasting.  Her words pierced my heart.  Priscilla is a very intelligent, well educated woman of God, a gifted intercessor and is not afraid to do battle with the enemy.  Her words reflect spirital combat experience and I do not take them lightly.  They are relevant to what I have been going through as I walk this path.  Thank you, Sweet P, for pouring your wisdom into my life.  I love you!


Miss Priscilla's Words of Wisdom to Me (and you!):
"In fasting, one turns up the HEAT.. to allow what is within to manifest..... one gets edgy, angry etc. As we see it manifesting and confess it as sin before the Lord it has to leave. This is part of the purifying process and MORE OF HIM and less of me.. In the MORE OF HIM and less of me is HIS FAITH is made manifest and mine is diminished. HIS faith is the faith that moves mountains..:) lp"


As I write this tonight, the Robert Frost poem below comes to mind.  It's how I feel about this fast.  I have "miles to go before I sleep".  I know the toughest days are just ahead, but I believe they will be what brings tremendous change.  God is allowing me to stop in the snowy woods of the evening in His presence that I might rest and be still long enough to hear His still small voice within my spirit.  Read this poem.  Then take a moment to close your eyes and think of the snowy scene Frost has painted for us.  Think of this time spent with Christ.  Invite Him to your starry evening and fellowship with Him.  After all, to find intimacy with anyone, you must spend quality time with them.  Are you in need of quality time with the Lord?  Try to set aside a moment this weekend just for you and Him.  Sweet Dreams to you all.....


Love in Him,
Karen

STOPPING BY WOODS ON A SNOWY EVENING

By Robert Frost

Whose woods these are I think I know.
His House is in the village, though:

He will not see me stopping here

To watch his woods fill up with snow.

My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farmhouse near
Between the woods and frozen lake

The darkest evening of the year.

He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there's some mistake.
The only other sound's the sweep

Of easy wind and downy flake.

The woods are lovely , dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

And miles to go before I sleep.

FASTING: Day 14 -

Hey Sweet Ones..... 


Pray for me today, please.  My body is filled with a resurgence of pain and inflammation from my RA and Fibromyalgia.  I can't use my hands enough to do my hair, (Terrible to let a good flat iron sit idle in my book), so I am really glad this isn't skype! Yes, I'm smiling. I thought this pain that has been slowly building each day was related to my lack or variance of nutrition, but as I am praying this morning, I believe it is an all out attack of the enemy because of my fast and this blog.  What nourishment I have had has all been good for me, so in the natural, my health issues should have gotten better with this fast.  But, the fast isnt' about that.  It's about breaking spiritual strongholds.  Enough said.


I hurt all over and I don't move very well today, but my spirit is not in despair.  I've been here before,  under far worse attack , and I can see he is just progressively going through his "Karen Attack Strategy" files.  Starts with one thing.  When that won't stop me, he takes up another.  Nothing new about his implementation plan , but still a harrassment.  That's what he is.  A harrassor.  A smoke and mirrors kind of player.  Illusions waiting to see if we bite and if we do, then he can bring the whole family of fallen angels with him for a feast at our expense.  (No, I'm not foaming at the mouth, so please don't worry)


Enter Jesus.  Jesus doesn't just even the score, he runs the ball down field to a  winning touchdown!  We are overcomers in Christ because he has already done the work of the cross for that purpose.  I admire theologians who can search the Scriptures and explain intricate teachings, time tables, and doctrines.  I'm not one of them and I doubt in my life time, God has slated me into that position.  I'm more of a bottom line, practical person.  Surely I like to decorate the bottom line and make it look and smell great.  I admit that.  To me, it's like icing on the cake (which, I might add is the real reason to eat cake at all!) 


What matters most to me (in this fast and my life) is that Jesus has put His plan into motion.  We goofed up and allowed Satan to steal life in the Garden from us.  He went to Eve.  God's creation of beauty because he was jealous and prideful.  She believed him. She and Adam took his bait. (This has to be the first couple with trust issues, pun intended)  They were cast away from God.  But, God's love was so great that He couldn't just let them go and suffer the fate He knew awaited Satan. 


So, yes, ENTER JESUS.  King of Kings.  Lord of Lords.  Lord of all!  Lord over Satan too.  The advocate for each of us before His Father.   We stand naked in our sin, without adorning apparel. Ashamed, knowing what we are left in our flesh.   But, He comes to us......offering a pure silk glowing robe to cover our naked sin.....because He loves and values us beyond measure.......and THIS is how HE presents US to His Father, Family.  In His royal garments!  Do you see yourself that way today?  Or are you looking in the mirror of regret and your own struggles?


When Satan send thoughts of worthlessness, shame or blame - remind Him  who you are in Christ by going to the Word of God and proclaiming it to Him.  This is what Christ did when Satan tempted him during his 40 Day Fast.  He didn't argue with him, but instead, just quoted God's Word. (I wish I could just quote anything I want to without Biblegateway.com, don't you?  That would sure help when doing a fast.)  Show Him the beautiful clothes of redemption Christ has purchased for you today with His own precious blood.  It's that same blood that Rev. 12:11 (my favorite verse) says will overcome him (Satan, evil) that will send him on his way.  He will return, but you will be armed.  "No weapon formed against you will prosper".


I'm not going to let him prosper today.  Are you?

Love in Him,
Karen

Holding my daughter's hand as she waits on

a train that will take her to a new adventure.

Though the enemy has bent my hands from RA,

  he cannot stop them from showing God's love. 

To her children, a mother's touch says

"I will always love you".

(Photo by Victoria Hinn/Rhode Island School of Design)

EARLY THANKSGIVING BLESSINGS!

    The hands of God are sometimes
   human, used to offer a gentle
   nudge to bring people together.
 

    Photo courtesy of Victoria Hinn of the Rhode Island
     School of Design, Providence, Rhode Island

FASTING: Day 13 - Spiritual Attacks During Fasting - Is there a purpose for them?

"Why should Jesus be tempted at all? Because innocent faith is not strong faith. The Garden of Eden is illustration enough. Innocent faith may be pure, but it needs testing to be strong." - Dr. Ralph Wilson

I like and agree with this quote by Dr. Wilson. One of the hallmarks of a passionate believer is their desire for greater faith in Christ. Faith to believe for every day needs like doing well on a test or making the mortgage payment on time, as well as faith to believe for answers that it seems aren't within our human capability to solve such as healing of terminal illness, financial collapse, broken marriages, or prodigal children. And a faith that continues to grow. That growth comes with trials and opportunites to use our faith.

We look at a small child and think how cute she is, but we don't think of her having great strength. We might ask her to take a bowl of cherries to the table, but we would not ask her to move the refridgerator to the garage. She has not developed the strong muscles to do such a thing. But, we would ask our college age son who trains at the gym or works out, to move that fridge. We know he is prepared and capable of doing so because he has already lifted much weight by training in the gym to do so.

Untested faith is uncertain faith. Fasting and trials are actually a blessing because they allow us to gain greater, stronger, more productive, effective faith. Like working hard in the gym is required to build well sculpted, strong muscles, building faith is painful and requires time, willingness and trust in God to lift the heavy burdens that come with stress and trials to do the faith building. James 2:20 says,"Faith without works is dead". Our faith does not produce results unless it is put into action, according to this passage. The action builds our faith at the same time as we see God move and change circumstances. A result of faithful prayers and living.

I believe one of the reasons God allows the enemy to war against us during our time of fasting is so that our faith will increase. As we battle against the temptations and attacks of the devil during our fast (which is intended to wear us down so we give up the fast either in fear or exhaustion), we tend to have a greater resolve to fight because we have a personal sacrificial investment in our own faith. As in the case of motherhood, the pain pregnancy and childbirth requires gives motherhood even greater value to a woman. Not to say that women who adopt children cannot understand the sacrifice required to be a mom, but I do think enduring the physical pain of bringing a child into the world through your own body contributes to the passion every birth mother feels for her baby. I praise God for every woman that adopts a child and voluntarily becomes a mother. Her sacrifice is no less than that of a birthing Mom with the exception of the physical toll of childbirth. The human mind tends to associate past physical pain with events, time, places, and things. I cannot stand to use gray anywhere in my house, and especially not on the walls, because I associate it with the seven months of expecting that made me so ill (I lost over 35 lbs.) when the walls of my Toronto apartment were painted gray. I would have to lay in bed and stare at those walls all day. To this day, gray walls make me nauseous. But I also believe our human mind has the capacity to weigh the cost of entering into that pain again to determine if the result is worth the pain investment.

The pain of fasting isn't enjoyable at times, even though there are some benefits like clearer thinking, less preparation for meals and more initimacy with the Lord (of course!!!) I can attest to that today, as my body is not doing very well. In fact, I am going to move to a Daniel Fast as of tomorrow to prevent any complications that might occur long term with the type of juice fast I chose to begin with. I've worked through all that with God in the past 24 hours and I feel good about my decision. The fast is still on, but it has just had to change in implementation. Even so, I know at the end of this 40 Day time, the results will be worth the cost. After researching many testimonies of fasting, many Christians find that the result of their fast may not be immediately seen, but will come with time. I am asking God, if this is the case for me, that when the harvest comes, He will in some way encourage me by allowing me to know my fast was a part of the deliverance at hand.

Living Treasured in Christ,
Karen

DAY 12 of My Fast - How Can We Know God is Calling Us to a Fast?

Nancy and Karen cooking Thanksgiving Dinner 2008

At the beginning of this past summer, my daugther, Ashton, joined me and my close friend, Nancy, for breakfast at a neighborhood deli that is just wonderful (shameless plug for TooJay's of Lake Mary, Florida!!!). I hadn't seen Nancy in quite awhile and was looking forward to experiencing the joyful fellowship in Christ we always share. Ashton asked me where I was headed to that morning, so I told her to meet Miss Nancy. (Yes, MISS Nancy! Shugah, fo gudnez saikes, ya'll, I em from the South and we refah to evary lovely ladah as "Miss", an they arah jus fine with it.) She asked if she could join us. I smiled to think that this beautiful young woman, my baby girl "forevah", wanted to spend time with two ole dames like Nancy and me. I had a feeling God was in this unplanned social event.

Ashton drove in her car so she could meet friends after and arrived after Nancy and I were already there. We were having breakfast, laughing and sharing what Christ was doing in our lives and the lives of our families. I must have said "God spoke to my heart" as we talked, because Ashton stopped and asked me what I meant. Did I hear His voice outloud? Was it just a feeling? Was it a voice in my head? How did I know it was Him? I knew she was seeking to own her own faith at this point in her life and I can understand why she might not understand that terminology. Some call it Christianese, and imply it's something negative. But, I think speaking in terms the Bible speaks to us is okay.....well, actually, it's biblical to be exact. I'm not ashamed if someone says I speak Christianese and just offer to teach them. Now, there'a a novel idea....teaching the world how to live life in Christ as opposed to having Christ fit into the lives of the worldly.

Nancy began to share with Ashton how she hears from God and knows it's Him. I reinforced her as she spoke that this was indeed the way I hear the voice of God too. I saw the light go on in Ashton's eyes that morning. She knew what we meant and she would be listening for it. God works if we give Him time. Just like with fasting. It takes time to understand and practice it as a part of your life.

Do you know when God is speaking to you? Can you discern His voice from yours or the devil? When my faith was young, that was difficult for me. As I walk with Christ year after year, I hear much faster and clearer. Once in a while I get "static", but I just keep praying and listening to Him.

Ways That God Speaks To Us:

1. You may hear Christians speak of the "inner leading of the Holy Spirit". This refers to an urging, leading or direction they feel as they pray or study God's Word. Some call it a feeling in their heart or a still small voice in their thoughts. Isaiah 30:21 (New King James Version)
says, " Your ears shall hear a word behind you, saying, “ This is the way, walk in it,” Whenever you turn to the right hand . Or whenever you turn to the left. " So, do not scoff at someone if they say they heard the voice of the Lord and they mean they REALLY heard it because that can be biblical.

2. Make sure what that small voice is saying lines up or agrees with Scripture. God will never tell you to do something that defies His Word or Scriptures.

3. Don't let a feel of peace alone be your confirmation that this leading is from God. I once counseled a woman who came to me very excited because she said God was giving her a new husband and allowing her to divorce her present husband, whom she had no grounds to divorce. She said because he didn't make her feel loved or beautiful and God wanted her to be happy, God had found her a man in her church to be her new "Godly" husband. She had total peace about it. So, when I brought out the Word of God to show her that this could not be from the Lord whether she had peace or not, she did not receive it. Sometimes, we make our own peace in our hearts so that we can do what we like and fulfill our own desires. Peace while you are disobeying God's Word is a sign that your life is not right in Christ and you need to search your heart and come back to Him.

4. If God is speaking to you about something, He will make a way for it to happen. Doors will open or close as you move along the path set before you. In this way, He can also direct your path.

5. There are those in the church with gifts of knowledge and prophesy that God may use to CONFIRM what He has already showed you. In that order! He confirms in YOUR heart and then confirms OUTSIDE your heart to follow. This is a less reliable form of seeking God's will, but cannot not be neglected in terms of how God speaks to His people even today like in the bible.

6. Now, don't come after me for this one, Ladies, but if you are a married woman, I Peter 3:1 tells us, "Wives, fit in with your husband's plans; for then if they refuse to listen when you talk to them about the Lord, they will be won by your respectful, pure behavior. Your godly lives will speak to them better than any words." If you feel God is telling you to do something and it does not fit into the life that you have with your husband OR he is not open to it, then continue to pray until God changes His mind or yours. God would not call you to anything that would cause you to violate that scripture in your marriage. However, do not confuse this with meaning that if your husband doesn't agree with you on something that you do not have the right in Christ to have your different opinion. You do, but it's God's will that you respect your huband's headship in your home and marriage, and continue to go to God (not the husband) for God to work between you. You are JOINT heirs of your inheritance and salvation in God. Equal but with different roles. Yes, I do believe in the principle of submission - both mutual and also by voluntary acknowledgement by a wife that the man is her head, and Christ is the head of the man.

I knew I was being called to this fast a month ago. In my personal prayer time, I felt a soft urging to think about a longer fast in response to some serious needs with our family, the move and my work. Each day, God would take me to Scriptures where fasting was entered into and miraculous results occured. He would bring books about fasting to my mind. I started re-reading them and my faith was being built. I hadn't entered into a 40 Day fast since I was younger. It scared me to be honest with you because of my health issues. But, as some situations in our family became acute and I was in the middle of dealing with their desruction to the ones I love most, I ran to prayer to talk about this fast with my Heavenly Father. At that point, I didn't think anymore about and just planned when I would start it. I now know because of my health issues, I needed to make a wiser plan than I have for such a longer fast, but I am not going to be legalistic or prideful about this and remember what matters is my denial of self.....not the destruction of self. Satan would love to even make fasting an idol in our lives. I realized today, that I have let it become more about the "how's" of fasting instead of the "why's".

I cover each of you in the Blood of Christ and ask Him to protect you and your families now and always. Put on your armour daily, Family of God. I wish I could meet each of you. Write and introduce yourself if you don't know me. We are already related in Christ! To my precious husband, Ross - Sweet Dreams.....this fast will bring me to you, Beloved.

Treasured and Loved,
Karen

Day 11: The Lights Went Out Today

Where's the Fasting Police when you need them, huh? I guess I'm going to have to make my own Fasting Citizen's arrest today. Can you do that? I mean, arrest yourself in the event you have committed a fasting infraction? Just seemed like the right thing to do. After all, God was my reporting supervisor on this project.

I told you I was keeping this blog to be accountable, so accountable I must be. Today I fell off the wagon. BUT, not by choice, mind you. I fainted earlier in the day and then later at Sam's Club, I got so dizzy I couldn't drive home. (I later realized that if you are anemic you need to be careful about fasting, so Miss Anemia Florida here learned the hard way!) As fate would have it, I had a bag of frozen strawberries I had just bought(to augment and make my juicing more affordable) in my car, so I opened it and shakingly crammed a couple in my trembling mouth. I also found about 8pecans in my purse ( MUFA leftovers from the Flat Belly Diet, Girls) and consumed them as well.

What a dilemma! At that point, sitting in my car trying to decide if I let my frozen fruit thaw out in the back and wait for the moment to pass, the choice was being involuntarily. That involuntary action being the cramming of fruit in my mouth. (I wished I had bought some kind of chocolate at this point when in Sam's) I determined later that I was being legalistic about this. God wasn't going to make me go back on the "Do not pass go...do not collect $200......go directly to fasting jail" spot was He?. Not for a couple strawberries and a few pecans! I would like to say I immediately knew the answer to that question was NO, but the False Guilt Guard rudely but in at that point to say "YES! Yes, He will, Karen. You have failed Him."

I can't believe I actually entered into this battle in my head over a few strawberries (juice in another form!) and nuts (surprisingly, nuts don't juice well, folks). I got home, put my things away, and sat down to cry. Seemed appropriate. Ross would undestand. Stress management for the feminine heart. I prayed and asked God to forgive me. I needed forgiveness. I wanted to be the perfect faster. I wasn't. I know He was shaking His head at this point saying, "Karen, Karen, Karen.....you are missing the point". And I was.

The point is that He is here when we fall off our wagon. I can't do this fast without His strength. Today proved that. I was relying on my daily routine.....the one that I had put in my fasting box plan and felt secure in. I neglected to factor in what happens when you can't juice and weren't home. Fasting 101 - Certain medical conditions like anemia affect how you can fast. They WON'T stop you from fasting, but they do require additional measures. And not to speak of that fasting can be in many different forms. Some people fast media like staying off the internet, not blogging, no Facebook, no news (yes, Ross, some people do not check the Phillies News everyday!) or they give up something they truly love.

Today, I learned it's about the element of sacrifice and denial that God is looking for from us. I am the one who chose to only do juice and hot broths. He helped me understand what I needed to do to make that happen. Today I had to offer this fast back to him. For me to fail was about pride instead of faith. When I read Dr. Bright's fasting guide, there was one part where he talked about a "violation of the fast". Ouch! I remember thinking as I read that if that happened to me, Satan would win and nothing I was fasting for would happen. There it is....the LAW! My bent towards perfectionism, one that I never measue up to in the flesh. God is wanting to transform me and I am fighting to stay back in my playpen! Wow, this fast seems to have turned back my spiritual clock in some ways, while at the same time pushed it forward. It's bringing out some deep issues I thought I had mastered and yet they are reappearing. My failing perfection today showed me that. I'm not ashamed to admit that to you. I know truth, but I feel exposed by this fasting. I cna't explain it yet.

Okay, so, I've documented my fasting glitch to all of you for accountability. I'm over it. Juiced tonight and am back on the plan tommorow. Not in my strength, but in God's. That's the key. Don't let this stop any of you from fasting! Just be smarter than I was if you have a medical condition and check with your doctor first. I did check with mine awhile back, but I didn't know I was amemic then. I goofed! So, if you are going to throw pies, please make them chocolate cream. :-)

Thanking God for My Brothers and Sisters in Him,
Karen

DAY 10 OF MY FAST: Doing Better

It's a new day and things seem to be more settled for me as I get into the routine of this fast. I juice every morning, making enough for the whole day, and then follow my plan of "eating" for the day. Fruit in the morning and late evening. Veggies and broth for lunch and dinner. It's feeling more comfortable for me, so take heart fellow, Fasters! It does get better!

No. 1 Result from this fast so far: A clearly defined calling from God.

MY CALLING: To encourage, equip and empower Christian women to live an abundant life in Him, bringing hope and healing through a deeper relationship with Christ, sharing testimonies of His life changing power and living a life led by the Holy Spirit.

I've been a business consultant and lay counselor for women for years. I have known God was leading me into a coaching practice as my vocation for quite a while now. But, the conflict for me had always been who was He calling me to....the world or the church. Yes, we are all admonished to share the Gospel and be a part of the Great Commission, but I do believe He also has specific people or groups that He gifts us to serve. He called certain of His disciples to bring the Gospel specifically to the Gentiles and not the Jews, whereas, others were called to the Jews. I'm not an effective evangelist and that has always bothered me. I try to share the message of God's truth and redemption with everyone, especially women, but I know I am not gifted in this area. But, what I feel God has given me grace to do is help women, who are believers, work out their faith and lives in Him as they pass through the different seasons of life, directing them to learn more about living in the power of the Holy Spirit and managing their lives more successfully. He certainly gave me enough personal experience over the years. Through my journey with Him, He taught me His ways. I followed and the results brought healing and blessing to my life. He is no respector of persons, so what He has done for me and others that have seen Him move powerfully, He will do for all of His people.

This may seem like a small thing as you read it, but to me, it's BIG! It's HUGE! For the Lord to show me that He has called me to believing women is monumental in my life. That doesn't mean I won't be sharing the Gosple with unsaved women, but it does mean the focus of my ministry will be to my sisters in Christ. I'm excited and so grateful. This fasting is good stuff!

I am an idea person. A strategic planner by nature, and I feel energized when I am working on projects that are highly results-oriented. My brain operates more in a male mode than a female mode when it comes to processing. I want the bottom line and not every detail that led up to it. The majority of women are the opposite. But, having so many things I want to do or see happen has also led me to be too diverse at times, which can be counterproductive. You end up not focusing enough on a specific area that you don't produce anything of real substance. God has shown me in the past, when I focused on specifics and followed through, He brought success to whatever He had led me to do.

Many of you have written to encourage me during my fast and to say you will be fasting with me during these weeks in some way, and I am very grateful for that. You are in my prayers each day. God is looking for available, willing faith, dear Family. There are moments when the enemy will place a thought in my head that this fast is in vain, not worth it, just too hard or that I will fail and God will be disappointed with me. I come back to him with God's Word, just as Christ modeled for us on His 40 Day fast in the desert and tell him that "the prayers of a righteous man availeth much". He's a liar. If not me, who will fast for my family? Who will stand in the enemy's way or bring down his strategies in my life and the lives of my family and friends?

Who will stand for you and yours? You can stand in the gap for yourself and others and see God's blessings happen. God is able to conquer Satan without me. The cross and resurrection took care of that. He has already won the war and we know the outcome , but He allows us to wage the battles for the present so that we are changed in the process. There is that "working out of our faith" principle. that has been so important in my spiritual growth.

May His love and peace be with you today. Whatever you are facing, turn to Him and follow.

Treasuring You in Him,
Karen
The Treasured Life Coach