FASTING: Day 31 - Appearances

Left, is a photo of the Mormon temple in Orlando, Florida.  I remember the first time I saw it.  It was evening. and all along the roof top edges, light was shining up high into the sky, illuminating the steeple.  I didn't know at the time it was a temple and thought it was a Jewish synagogue instead.  Until seven years ago, I really thought the Mormons were born again Christians.  I now know that isn't true, but at the time, the beauty of this building touched my heart and I came back later in the week as the sun set to take photos of it. If you have any questions about Mormonism, I'd like to refer you to my friend Shelly Grimm's web site at http://www.lifeafter.org/ .  I love the Mormon people, as they are some of the finest people I have ever met.  But, they do not believe in the same Jesus we do, though they will say they do.

This temple reminds me of Isaiah 58, where the Pharisees are complaining to God because they have fasted and He is not answering their prayers.  He tells them that He is not pleased by their fast.  Though they look very religious, pure and holy, in fact they are not.  For as they are fasting for God to hear their cries, they are living in sin by treating others with disdain, deceit, unloving and doing wrong.  God says "Is this the fast I have called you to?"  He says that sarcastically.  Yes, I do think He spoke this way in His Word.  Maybe He really said "Give me a break, you evil guys!  Don't play games with me.  I know you are trying to look holy, but your hearts harbor greed, evil and hate.  You don't care about anything but looking good in front of others. Now, listen to what a REAL fast is about and what it will do.  Then you will know WHY I don't hear you!" 

I've had some negative responses to my fasting blog.  One person emailed to say that if I really wanted to please God, I would have done my fast in secret and not made a big deal of it.  She wasn't unkind about it and I think she really felt that way. I know there are verses that say when you fast, don't complain and look sad because you can't eat so others will feel sorry for you or think how holy you are.  I understand that.  I wanted to answer her here just in case others felt the same way.

I didn't want to talk about my fast to be honest.  I wasn't sure I was going to do one this long in the beginning.  I just knew that God had been tugging at my heart for a month to think about doing a much longer fast.  I kept praying and He kept talking to my heart about it.  As I stated in the beginning, it would have been alot easier for me to fast without telling anyone. In my opinion, anyway.  But, as I took that to God, I know He moved me to seek prayer support for my fast and that He wanted my fast to encourage others to do so as well.  Trust me, though I have been doing shorter fasts for over 30 years, I did not look forward to this 40 Day fast.......more specifically, I didn't look forward to failing at it. 

I believe I followed God when I started blogging my journey here.  I didn't do so in an attempt to say "Hey look how Godly Karen is......she's fasting 40 days....wow!"  No, I wanted to encourage others to join me, pray for me and cover my family in the blood of Christ as I did this because I knew the enemy would attack as God brought answers and deliverance.  And he has.  My daughter was in a hit and run accident in the second week.  She was fine and I believe the fasting is what spared her.  My son is making progress in his own journey of struggles and I see God doing a mighty work in Him though he has encountered new harrassments from the enemy.  One special young friend went through crisis and I am seeing God meet her need.  I believe there was power in praying for her because fasting breaks yokes the enemy puts on believers.  Another best female friend feels certain her career position is turning around and has had good news. This was something I was fasting for.  So many specific things have taken place that I have prayed for, while at the same time, some terrible blows and crisis have occured too.

Besides seeing very evident answers to things, God has done so much in me.  That is what I see was His real purpose.  I have failed in some ways in this fast, as a couple of times I had to eat something small but solid.  I felt so bad the other night I was concerned, so I made a few eggs.  It made me very sick.  I felt defeated over that until I prayed.  The Lord reminded me this fast is not about MY strength, MY success, or MY ability.  It's about depending on HIM.  I'm learning I can get back up and stand before Him, knowing He is not judging me. 

I've faced the old demon of rejection in my life.  I'm not through that one yet, but I'm making progress.  I've missed my husband during this month so much and have watched the enemy try to use that to divide us, but God has come in and brought peace and patience.  He's once more taught me that my worth is not in what I look like, the abilities I have, the possessions I own, or even in my faith.....be it large or small.........though those things may make me more effective, successful, or productive, they have nothing to do with my value.  My value to God is just in BEING ME.......yours is in being YOU.  And truthfully, what He looks for is obedient hearts.  Not talented ones.  Intelligent ones.  Beautiful ones.  Just obedient ones.  This is what He is looking for from all of us.

I know I am rambling.  I'm sorry.  He has given me some powerful messages during this fast. I'm in the process of writing them now. Tonight, I just wanted to remind myself and you, that whether we fast or don't fast......succeed or fail.....look great or look not so great......He couldn't love us more than He does now.  Yes, we may do things for Him and build His Kingdom, but we can't DO anything more for Him to love us more.  He just does................And because He loves us, we can love each other.  The world hated Him.  They will hate us too.  Don't be afraid.  He is with us and He has left us The Comforter.......the power of the Holy Spirit.....we are more than equipped.

Loving in Him,
Karen

THE BEAUTIFUL SOUNDS OF CELTIC WOMEN.....ENJOY!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sfO6JpR5Ip8&feature=PlayList&p=8195CF0F9E4B638E&index=0&playnext=1

Music to worship out Lord to.......

Praying this afternoon and thanking God for His power, love, might and deliverance.

Sending You Love,
Karen

My daughter, Tori, loves the Celtic Women.
If anyone knows their 2010 Tour Schedule,
I'd sure like to have it!  God knew what He was
doing when He created our sister Eve, Ladies!

FASTING: Day 29 - We all need a loving nudge sometimes......

http://www.eaglesneedapush.com/

Have you ever seen the amazing videos, books and inspirational tools at Simple Truths (http://www.simpletruths.com/)?  I go there often to see what they have newly available.

The above link is one of my favorites.  A mother eagle helping her young eagle child leave the nest high above the treetops so that he might learn to soar with confidence.  She loves him enough to nudge him out of the nest.  She knows he will love soaring on the currents of the wind.  He was born to do so.  The wind will fill his wings and she knows the surge of power and joy her young eagle will experience once he gets over the fear of the first leap from the nest.

Aren't we just like that with God?  We love our comfortable nest in His care and just want to stay there nice and cozy under the "shadow of His wing".  But, He knows we have glorious skies yet to soar and that if we stay under His wing, we will not know that joy.  There will be rain, storms and  powerful winds to deal with.  But, He has equipped us with wings that will repel that rain. We have a nest that we can come back to when the storm gets too dangerous to fly in.  And, those powerful winds, will be what propels us to soar even higher.  They won't break us.  We are designed to make good use of them as we use self control in the middle of it all.

This fast is a "nudge out of the nest" for me.  I wasn't comfortable with it because I didn't want to fail.  Not fail God, my family, my friends, or myself.  I've enjoyed the soaring.  The rains have come, but I am dried off now.  The winds have been high and seem to be going higher, but that just means I can see from greater heights.  And my nest......well, although in the natural, it is looking pretty empty, Jesus has kept it for me to come back to......a place of safety, love and rest.  It's not a place to hide, not from Him and not myself.  But, to take shelter instead.

I have 11 more days of this 40 Day Fast.  I'm a bit worn out, to be honest.  But, I know there is more to learn.  Right up to the last day.  Some days I feel alone.  Other days, I feel totally encircled in love.  But, one thing I have found, there is never a day that I don't feel the Lord around me in a deeper way.  His Presence is here when I feel up and when I feel down.  Many breakthroughs have already taken place as a result of Him honoring my fast and I am so grateful for that.  Many problems arose during my fast that I could have never anticipated, but required spiritual strength and application.  I was ready because of my fast. 

Fasting empowers you to minister to others and bring deliverance in the Name of Christ.  It puts you under God's X-Ray so you can see what is underneath your surface personality, going right to you spirit and heart.  It's greatest gift is a deeper, renewed intimacy with the Lord that will urge you to make fasting a regular part of your life in Jesus because you never want to lose that sense of closeness with Him.  It's a Win-Win situation, Sweet Friends.

Today, I am wrung out, but I feel the encouragement of God slowly coming over me this morning.  There is much to do today and even though my heart feels a bit sad this morning, I feel a slight breeze in my backyard.  It seems to be building slowly today.  I have a feeling it's going to be getting stronger.  Strong enough to carry this Lady Eagle to a lovely soaring experience before the day is out. 

I've been nudged from the nest.  Will you join me?

In His Love,
Karen

Soaring Eagles Get the Best View.......

FASTING: DAY 22 - My Empty Nest

For the past few years, I found myself in discussions with other parents of young adult children on the verge of flying the coup.  As the topic turned to the dreaded empty nest years, most of my friends bemoan it's arrival and say they know it is going to be a difficult time for them. 

I didn't seem to share that opinion.  Not because I don't adore my children.  I do. They are my babies and always will be.   But, in raising my children, I didn't have  extended family support (my parents were both with the Lord)  and therefore, the "grandparent weekends" alot of my friends talked about enjoying with their husbands, I had never known.  I think it took it's toll on me over the years, so I would always say that I think I wouldn't have much of an adjustment to the empty nest at all.That's what I thought at least.  But, for the past month or so that I've been rising, working, eating (well not lately of course), and sleeping in this big house by myself, I'm finding the empty nest isn't so comforting. 

I'm what you might call an extroverted introvert.  I love people, so socializing energizes me.  I like taking time to get to know who you are and what you dream of doing with your life.  After all, I may want to help you do it!  But, after being with people for a certain length of time, I'm ready for some solace and time to pray.  I will listen to some music, drink truffle latte's or tea,  and hibernate for a little while.  Not for long, but long enough to catch my breath, fill up my tanks and be ready to go again. 

But, there's no one here now to carry me into exhausted rest and drive me to retreat.  I'm in  retreat mode 24/7.  Two kids in college, one living in an apartment way across town and working, two boys in PA with Ross.  My husband lives and works in Pittsburgh, PA, as he waits for me to sell our house here and move.  So, my long awaited  "quiet time" without kids or male type people to cook and clean for (that would be sons and a husband) has arrived.  ( I will miss my "girls only" household dress code.)  With it has come a  slow creeping loneliness that I have not experienced since I was young.   I can say after having my heart and house filled with the joys of being a wife and mother, it's not the same kind of loneliness though.  I started listening to Christmas music in September this year.  Enough said.

I now have greater empathy for my friends who's children have left home.  I used to envy the freedom and clean homes they enjoyed.  They could go to the movies or dinner any time.  I still had some sweet young life waiting at home starving for Mom to cook.  Now, I understand their hearts more.  I have seen a look in their faces that depicts the way I feel right now.  Not sadness, but loss.  Life isn't over, but life is altered.  An anticipated loss, but a loss still.  It requires a life transition that takes time.  We have to give ourselves that time as we process it mentally, spiritually and emotionally.  Mostly, emotionally I think.  It's not grief really, as we know those kids will come back to visit.  And with the present trend of older children (often with their own children) coming to live back at home, they might even be coming back for more than a visit. 

I think the loss is situational and will fade in time.  But, I do think it's important to be active in your transitioning from one season of life to another.  Just as the Word says when we remove a  dark presence from of our life (not that children are darkness in our lives, goodness NO! Well. hopefully no, anyway), we must sweep it clean, and then fill it back up with the Spirit of God.  When you have experienced any loss, it's wise to replace that vacant space in your life and heart with something healthy and rewarding. 

I realized tonight that even though I am waiting to step into a different life in Pittsburgh with Ross, I need to "fill my house" with what and WHO the Holy Spirit is leading me to because there is a void right now.  I'm just starting to see how He has done that for me. If we are the Lord's child and walking with Him, every part of our life has a purpose.  His purpose for me during this time was my call to fast and the lessons I needed to learn from it.  It's no where near over yet. 

I miss my kids.  I miss my husband.  But, I am  spending time with special friends before I leave and that is a gift that I will carry with me as I move to Pittsburgh.  Drinking in every precious moment with the Lord I have right now is changing me.  Odds are this time will never come again for me.  At least, I can't imagine being away from my Sweetheart this long for any reason in the future.  I hope not.  But, this time is not lost.  It's been rich in spiritual knowledge and intimacy.  I am thankful for that.  God chose it for me because He knows I will need these lessons to walk in His calling for my life in the future. Is He allowing you to wait on Him as He prepares you for something in the future?

I find it so interesting that God "arranged" this empty nest time for me as He called me to this 40 Day Fast.  On one hand, it doesn't require me to cook much.  That helps.  And, it gives me time and space to seek Him, pray in intercession and to be able to sit still to listen in my heart to what He is saying. Waiting.  That hasn't been my forte until the past two years.  Along with blessing me with an amazing husband, God used this special man to teach me patience.  I've never been known for it before.  I always had an underlying sense of not making things on time or not being able to wait for God to move.  Like I am holding my breath all the time.  (Don't go psychologist on me here, Girls) I am finding out that I need His strength and closeness right now as I face these lonely days and nights.  I have learned paitence and can wait on Him.  He is here.  Right on time.

Have you experienced an empty nest?  Did it leave you feeling lost or did you let God "fill your house"?  If you found God waiting in the empty rooms, share that when you see a woman with that  look  of loss on her face.  She needs you.  Hug her.  Have coffee.  Cook dinner together.  Watch a movie.  Go for a walk.  Pray together.  Replace loss with relationship and let God make it one of the best seasons of your life because you shared it with a sister.  I'm sharing it with mine right now. 

Love My Sisters in Christ,

Karen

PRAYER REQUEST:  I wrote about my friend, Nancy, a few days ago.  There is a picture of Nan and I cooking Thanksgiving dinner.  Tuesday, Nancy's elderly parents were hit in their car by a city bus in their hometown in Michigan.  Nancy's 87 year old Mom was killed and her Dad is in the hospital with neck and back injuries and now in a halo brace.  Please lift up Nancy and her family tonight and ask God to give them strength, comfort, peace and rest.  Thank you so much, Sweet Ones!

FASTING: Day 20- Turn Up The Heat in Your Spirit with Fasting!

Thank you to Jim Duffy, CEO & President of Refining Fire Chiles of San Diego, California, for the photo of the beautiful hot chiles he raises and markets.  Jim is "turning up the heat" by sharing the gospel through his business and the youth ministry he supports with it.  Go to http://www.refiningfirechiles.com/ and read his powerful story.  Blessings to you, Jim!


Country steak with gravy.  Garlic, mashed red potatoes.  Middle Eastern green beans over herbed rice.  Chocolate chip cookies.

No, this isn't fasting delirium kicking in.  It's what is sitting on my stove right now - hot, delicious and waiting to be enjoyed by my daughter, Ashton, who is on her way here after work to eat one of her favorite "Momma Meals". 

 A surprising thing happened as I cooked  for my precious girl.  After 20 days of not eating solid food (except for my one day of Daniel fasting when I had soup and celery and my Sam's Club near fainting ingestion of two strawberries and 8 pecans), I wasn't  tempted to set another plate and sit myself down to dine.  No one was more shocked than me. How can it be that a G.R.I.T.S. (Girl Raised in the South) chick like me would pass up her Momma's country steak recipe after not having real food for 20 days? I mean, not one bite, friends.  It sure smells good, and at this point of cooking, I would have at least had a bite of something just to make sure I had seasoned it right.  (You all do this when you cook, now, and you know it! ) But, somehow as I made this meal, it became an offering of love.  Not just for my daughter, but for my Jesus.

I had prayed that this fast would help me arrive at a new place of self-control in my life.  A place where nothing, not even a basic need to eat, would dominate my desire to please my Savior.  That day came today.  It was staring me in the face on my kitchen stove.  My own Mom's Signature Southern Meal.....country fried steak!  I wanted it, but I wanted to please the Lord more.  Eureka!  It was a new experience for me.  But, it isn't just an experience.  It is empowerment to allow the Holy Spirit to come and do His work in my life and the lives of those I am interceding for. 

Satan hammered away at me yesterday.  Down to my core.  Bringing up old issues.  Telling me to stop writing.  I don't have to be a gifted writer to share my testimony.  I am a sinner saved by grace with a story of redemption to tell in the best way I can.  I'm not worried about being a great writer.  Yes, I want to bring praise and excellence to anything I do for Jesus and I pray for ability as I write about my love for him.  But, I don't write to be known for my ability. He knows why I write.  I want to expose everyone to His awesome love and power.  Writing is one way I can do that.  Someone told me along time ago, that spoken words are beneficial for the moment, but the written word is forever there to minister to generations.  I like that.

I want hurting women to know that HE LOVES THEM and that their value has to be found only in Him and not what someone else thinks of you!  It doesn't matter where they are in their life.  Single Moms feeling lost and lonely with PB&J smeared faces looking up sweetly knowing Mommy will make the moon rise.  Widows looking at a desk full of bills and statements piling up that they have never had to deal with, while they grieve the loss of their Beloved.  Young women dealing with past issues of abuse wondering if they will ever be able to trust any man enough to become a wife.  Older women who feel the ache of disappointment and lost dreams.  Successful, professional women who have invested their lives in a career, who long for their arms to be filled with a warm, cooing bundle of baby love, thinking they have lost their chance for marriage, family and homemaking.

We all hurt.  But, in different ways.  Speak from where you are into the lives of others and see the healing it brings.  Nothing is more comforting than the supportive love of someone who has been through the same thing as you and has come through it successfully.  It brings hope.  Simply, just share the love you have found in Christ with others and let Him bring the harvest in their heart.  Our job is to sow the seed.  The Holy Spirit will give it root and fruit.  And someone else may harvest it.

If you have a testimony to the healing, redemptive power  in the Gospel of Jesus Christ,  do as Rev. 12:11 (yes, my life verse) says and "overcome evil by the blood of the Lamb and THE WORD OF OUR TESTIMONIES".  However you are capapble of doing so......in word, song, writing, serving, loving, leading, teaching, comforting, edifying.....whatever God leads you to do.....just do.

In being "doers" of the Word, we will turn up the heat (Big Habanero Style) on the enemy of God by bringing restoration to the object of the Savior's delight, US!  "US" being all men and women, saved and unsaved.  Fasting puts pressure on Satan.  He will do whatever he can to keep you from walking in this discipline because he knows it means defeat for him.  The heat of fasting does two things: (1) It allows buried sins to come to the surface, where God can help us see them, repent  and bring us restoration (like purified silver); and (2) It breaks strongholds, bondage, and demonic attack off of us and the lives of those we pray for.

I am asking you to consider fasting as a part of your walk with Christ on a regular basis.  Remember Ezra and Nehemiah of the Old Testament?  Both men of God who fasted for the repentence and return of their people to God.  God honored them both. He also met all their requests for provision and visions.  They are just God's people like us.  They were just born earlier.  Am I talking to an Ezra or a Nehemiah here today?  Who is willing to stand in the gap for others?

Love in Christ,
Karen

FASTING: DAY 19 - Letter to Satan

Blair Wingo of P4CM.COM.......
"Letter to Satan" by Blair Wingo

Please click on the link in red above. 

New message from a new generation of Christian soldiers.

Clear and simple.  Simple obedience.  No excuses. 

No flirting with the enemy.

She says it perfectly in a way  her generation will hear.

Every generation should hear.

Will you?   Will I?  I ask myself after listening to her poem, what do I need to be where Christ want's me to?  I ask God to strip me of whatever holds me back from being pure in obedience to Him. 

Jealousy?  Unforgiveness?  Pride?  Fear?  Impatience?   I think I can say yes to all of those being some part of my life.   I pray Lord, cleanse me of these sins that stand between You and me.

Treasuring You in Him,
Karen

FAST: DAY 18 - The "WHY'S" of my fast

This picture was taken in our Pittsburgh front yard at the height of Autumn spendor last year.   I'm so happy today becaucse  it  finally feels a bit like Autumn in Florida.  Just cool enough to peak it's face in the door and say "Hey". (That's Southern for hello) 

Fall is a reminder to me that though growth and maturity often come via pain and discomfort, they propel us forward  into rewarding changes.  And if we take time to stop and look, we will find amazing beauty from the process of change.  Beauty that was not there before.   Like the fire red and golden ambers of the leaves on our trees. 

 Now those leaves have fallen to the ground and our trees are barren.  Soon, Mr. Winter will come and those very branches, that once were adorned by the blaze of color above, will be veiled in frosty shimmer.  What appears to be loss, has once again brought about another form of beauty.

Fasting has been this for me. 

I am about to move to a new state to establish a new life.  A life that I prayed and fasted for in 2007.  God blessed my petition and obedience to His Word with the marriage to the Man of God He has called me to be in marriage covenant with, Ross.   Yes, I'm thrilled.  But, the challenges have and are still difficult.  Two homes to maintain and sell.  Five young adult children to guide through this blended family transition at the point they are entering adulthood.  College costs.  Nurturing our new mariage and getting to know each other better.  Total adjustment.  Unexpected illness. 

These were the "WHY'S" that I started with at the beginning of my fast.

They are still there, but as God leads me during this time of humbling myself in submission to Him alone, interceding for so many people, and just being in His presence, those "WHY'S" aren't what is motivating me to continue.  It's the change in me that holds me.  I'm not doing this for God and not for those reasons.

God's fast is turning the "green leaves" of my heart and soul into bright red, pumpkin orange, and golden amber.  Their beauty is bringing me joy and pleasure.  Soon, they will drop off, with branches waiting for God's first lovely snow and will be adorned for a different kind of beauty.   I am decreasing so God can increase within me.

This has now become my WHY.

Tomorrow, I want to talk about Isaiah 58.  Take a look at it and see what you think.

I'm feeling great, by the way.  No hunger.  Just drinking liquids.  Less fresh juice or anything that might start digestion really.  This is the way I will go in the future for other fastings too.  My thoughts are clear and I hear God without confusion.  It's not easy, but it's wonderful.  I am praying you will join me in a lifestyle of fasting and see what God might have for you and yours.

Treasured and Loved,
Karen